Mr. Anthony: I've just finished watching the I Survived and Back Episode.
If it's not too personal..what were you referring to when you mentioned that "things were not OK to do because others did it & there were things that you should not have said or things that you should have said but didn't? Did your ordeal change the way that you feel and thing about cetain things in life?
Georgia Girl, 2 parts, I've had that question asked a few times now and I usually give around about answers. I really had a list I had done. This time though I'll give a few specifics. Before I do though I must say that a lot of ok stuff or stuff that is in a gray area is not ok. There are no maybe's, right or wrong only.
A lot of mine was at UPS, since that was where I was most of my life. One's like sometimes we'd make fun of people with less. We all thought a laugh was good, especially if the person didn't know about it. One though stuck out the worst. An old man who was dying of lung cancer and could only lay around the house. His medicines came to him but he also ordered stuff. We were trained to cut seconds and then minutes would take care of themselves, and I was good at that. His packages were to DR (driver release) them on the porch, even though we knew that they would remain there until somebody came home or a neighbor would bring them in. I done that so many times to so many people I knew could not retrieve them. I figured it was my job and they weren't happy if you broke the rules. I did, even before the heart attack though bring them in one day when he yelled, and he asked everyday. Before he died I would knock, carry them in, open them up, and place them on his coffee table, box beside the couch. I eventually got caught and man as I ever in trouble. I still watched that though, all the times I didn't. There were so many times that I saw people that just needed help with simple things, I didn't have time. Times that my kids needed to talk to me, but I was to busy doing business at home. Times they wanted to help, but I was too busy cutting those seconds, even when on my time.
While I never was one for displacement anger, I would cut people short, especially my own family when I worked, and I worked all the time. There were times where I would lie for various reasons. Many of my thoughts were horrible, still working on that, lol. Times where while driving I was just an idiot, bound and determined that nobody was getting out of would pass me. Times I lied rather than spend time with those I loved.I went along with something I knew was false when those I thought were above me spoke about another. Most times I never added, I just remained silent. Just as bad.
I saw me for what I really was. I've a long ways to go but here is one of the biggest things I saw that I've worked to correct. I was judgmental. I held a grudge.
My eyes were on what I thought was the prize, when if had I have paid attention, the prize was right in front of me.
Yes, though the world sometimes still gets in my way, even at the darkest hours, there is still Light. I no longer feel the need to judge others, point out who could "do better" or who lives this way or that way. I see now that I have enough issues of my own to work out. When someone wants to talk, I talk and when they want to listen, I listen. If I see someone wants the lane I'm in, no problem. If someone tells a lie, I correct it. If Denise makes bad food, I tell what I think if asked, I just do it gently. That don't happen much. I don't always achieve it but I try to be the change I want to see in the world.
Oh, there were so many. That is just a tip of the iceberg. There were just so many opportunities lost and ones that should have not been taken. So many bad thoughts. In was a boastful, prideful, arrogant, butt hole.
If you can touch it, buy it, sell it, or smell it... it is just moth and rust. I'm not afraid of death but I am afraid of ways to die. Even worse, sometimes I'm afraid of life. I pray every night and many times throughout the day. I try and watch my language but that's another avenue I'm still working on.:) I seldom get mad. Whatever I'm doing can wait now if someone that I love needs me, or just about anybody for that matter. Things is, we have a God that loves us dearly. When I was younger I was taught at church this was a big angry God who was just waiting to damn us. If one stops to think, if that were the case then he would not have sent his only Son to save us. I have a hard time hating, that is just so strong of a negative energy and a waste of time when He has provided so much we can love. I also started standing my ground and ground for whomever was right and needed it. Enough changed that it makes it hard to live in this world. But we must, for the next world is great.
Thank you for opening up like that, Anthony. I too just finished watching your segment and was greatly moved by it. I will be praying for you.
Lori Bei Durst said...Hi Anthony,
As always great replies to the comments, but one thing, if I may be so bold, you should post the answers to questions in your blog so more people see your wonderful answers and experiences. Your reply to GeorgiaGirl was thoughtful and detailed...loved it and others would too! Hope your weekend was healthy(no fever) and your dentist appt. is successful. Glad you are taking Vit. D! :o)
CourtneyC said...Hi Anthony, I'll second what the last commented said, you should post this as a blog entry or somewhere where more people are likely to find it. It's worth sharing to as many who can read it as possible. I remember hearing you say you thought the things you had done were OK because everyone else did them, and I actually had the impression that you were in real estate, and I pictured you meant swindling buyers in some way, taking shortcuts, kickbacks,etc. Funny the ideas we come up with when there is too little info., huh?
But it turns out you meant something as benign as simply not speaking up when someone is disparaging others, and not going out of your way -above and beyond the call of duty - while on the job (ESP. A job where the minutes you spent are what is used to value your performance).
Well, I'm floored. You've given me a lot to think about. I guess everyone thinks, "Well, I'm not so bad," but it's relative, isn't it? Bad as compared to who?
Well, I hope your loved ones get over the flu soon, and you take care.
anthony7 said...HI Lori Bei, today went good but painful. I felt every stitch this time, but I ask him to go on. No use in prolonging it. Still bleeding a lot 3 hours later. Maybe I had too much blood, lol. The vit D seems to be working, everybody's sick except me, knock on wood. Had a ball this weekend, thanks. I ate everything I knew I wouldn't be for a few days, fed all the animals, the cows were about out of hay, so that today i could just heal.
Hi Courtney C. The heart attack was 1-31-05, they got the date wrong. I got my real estate license in 2000, but I also had a large hatchery, supply company, and a small farm along with UPS at the time. After a guy accidentally lost control of a package and it tore my rotator cuff in my left arm, the left side muscles, and C2,5,6 in my neck. Out of all of that I still kept going until the heart attack in 05, but eventually the arm went the rest of the way out and finished tearing 2 1/2 years later. I had worked with it and caused all kinds of spurs they grin off and placed posts to reattach something in there, I had a loss of 37% use of the arm. The other doctor on the neck though they paid off. Without being 100%, UPS has a policy that you don't come back. So me and my mom opened our own company, she is still there. Her and dad taught me honesty when I was a kid, so whatever I became after that, I was still mostly honest. After the NDE it was hard to stay at UPS, so I guess the arm going out was a blessing. In real estate I was brutally honest. I did work the last year mostly with foreclosures. While it was not always well received I did manage to earn the respect of the companies I worked with, and the people as well. Honesty isn't always appreciated at first, lol. I don't bend, I'll break first. I read something a year or two ago I liked. "Today's mighty Oak is yesterday's nut that held it's ground". :)
I need your all's opinion. What if I created a blog for questions? http://anthonykimbroughbeyondandbackquestion.blogspot.com . I can copy and paste the questions from here to there, but I'll still leave them here too.